beyoncebeytwice:

i love how no matter how badly you fuck up benadryl cumquat’s name everyone on here still knows who ur talking about

(via kjxq)

— 1 day ago with 65568 notes

alvxandra:

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i’ve never seen something so accurate

(via kjxq)

— 1 day ago with 212643 notes

tacoposey:

after my procedure at the hospital today my doctor tried to explain all of the medications he’s putting me on and i was kind of out of it on pain meds and he goes, “and i’m going to be putting you on some serious steroids, do you have any problems with that?” 

and apparently i looked at my mom and whispered, “i’ll never play major league baseball” and started crying

(via kjxq)

— 1 day ago with 261887 notes
nikkipher:

THIS ONE TIME A KID IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD WAS LATE GETTING HOME BECAUSE HE WAS BUYING DRUGS SO HE TOLD HIS MOM HE GOT KIDNAPPED AND SHE MADE HIM REPORT IT TO THE POLICE AND HE DESCRIBED THE KIDNAPPER AS COUNT OLAF AND THEN THIS HAPPENED

nikkipher:

THIS ONE TIME A KID IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD WAS LATE GETTING HOME BECAUSE HE WAS BUYING DRUGS SO HE TOLD HIS MOM HE GOT KIDNAPPED AND SHE MADE HIM REPORT IT TO THE POLICE AND HE DESCRIBED THE KIDNAPPER AS COUNT OLAF AND THEN THIS HAPPENED

(via kjxq)

— 1 day ago with 431367 notes

padalecki-party:

blackichigo1:

LMAOOO HAHAHA

this was the greatest joke I have ever heard

(Source: sizvideos, via toodopetoexist)

— 1 day ago with 188516 notes

fannibal-crack:

On today’s episode of “noticing the important stuff”…

(via comicsannibal)

— 1 day ago with 1491 notes

unsuccessfulmetalbenders:

unsuccessfulmetalbenders:

being black is really wonderful and convenient bc i can just be sitting here in my room like this

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and whenever people come looking for me to do stuff i dont even really have to hide all i have to do it turn off my light and

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and then when they leave i just 

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ive received this question so many times since i posted this yesterday so imma just leave this right here ok  

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(via toodopetoexist)

— 1 day ago with 365264 notes

janemba:

mahoganay:

heyfunniest:

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this is what butts sound like

i will forever reblog this post

ok but this goes off it rly does???? lordemusic sample this on your next single!!!

(Source: shuffleberry, via toodopetoexist)

— 3 days ago with 252685 notes